The Trials and Trivialities of Katherine Atkinson
by Airia Black
Summary: Meet Katherine Atkinson, the estranged ward of Miss. Maudie and watch as she grows from childhood to young adult along with her relations with the Finch family, including a very special Jack. Maycomb is about live through its most indecent scandal yet.


Disclaimer: I do not own any characters or any other devices owned by the Harper Lee trademark. Any fictional character's not recognized in the text from To Kill a Mockingbird are a creation of my own literal devices.

AN: An interesting piece I put together in my spare time, more then likely to have more then just one chapter since I'm still not finished with Katherine's story. In general, I don't know what to say except I was not the only one of my friends who thought that Jack Finch would make an interesting character to pair someone up with. Read and Review.

* * *

**The Times and Trivialities of Katherine Atkinson**

**Chapter 1- **An Introduction

I was 11 years old when I entered the Finch house, 11 years old, going on 12. At the time, Mrs. Finch, my next door neighbor was still alive and was expecting her second youngin', Jean-Louise, who was to be born anytime soon.

Now what you may ask was I doing in Maycomb Alabama? Simple. I had been sent there to live with my Aunt after my Daddy died a year earlier. And so here I was, a northern girl from Upstate New York livin' down in the most southern part of the country, trying to survive in a place where the blacks and white still got on like it was back in the day of slavery. But still, the change was a happening, if only little by little…But anyways, back to my story.

Now Maudie Atkinson really wasn't my Aunt, in fact, I don't think she was even related to me at all. But still, somehow, it was her that was my benefactor in the case that both of my parents died. I had seemed to remember bits and pieces of her, only fragments of memories, but supposedly, when I was just a youngin' myself, my mother and her had been mighty good friends.

Now, the only reason why I ever actually went up and over to the Finch's house was because Mrs. Finch was to be expecting another baby. Of course they had another child, Jeremy, but he was only a tot. Her husband, Mr. Finch, was a lawyer, and was constantly working, so Aunt Maudie only found it suitable that I went over and helped around the house for a couple hours of the day while Mr. Finch was at work. So while Mrs. Finch wasn't to be expecting for a couple months, I went over everyday and did my thing…housecleaning, playing with Jem, making meals, you name it.

Well over the few past months that I had been going to their house everyday, each time, my stay seemed to be longer and longer, until one day I realized that I was at the Finch's house till morning up till sun down. And what a fine friend I had made indeed. Mrs. Finch, or shall I call her Emma, was the most kindest, most beautiful human being I had ever met. And I was only 12 at the time.

For hours, we'd talk about anything and sometimes most nothing, but no matter what, we'd talk. She was young for her age, only 35, and I considered that a great deal much younger compared to her husband Mr. Finch, who at the time was 42.

But it seemed as the months wore on, and Emma's pregnancy grew near, she seemed to become more tired and her eyes would sometimes show hints of sickness that grew in them. At the time, I thought nothing of it, but now, I realize it was because Emma was ill.

Soon Christmas came, and what a joyous celebration it was. Aunt Maudie and I were invited to the Finch's house, but unfortunately, Aunty had come down with the flu, so only I attended. But even in her sick state, she lectured me on the "please and thank-you's" that all young ladies should know.

Everything was amazing. There was Christmas cake and turkey and even those cute little dumplings that you see propped up in store windows. Naturally, Emma had cooked it all, and I had offered to help her too, but she told me that this was one time that she could do it alone.

So there we all where, the whole Finch family and me. I sat next to Mr. Finch and his brother, Jack, which made me feel rather uncomfortable because I didn't know either of them. But still, I enjoyed myself the whole night long, especially when we got to pull the crackers. I did mine with Jack, who surprisingly enough, looked as though he was half of Mr. Finch's age. Either way, it was a night to remember. And to this day, I will cherish my first Christmas with the Finch's.

Soon after that, Emma's baby was born, and a very happy day it was…at least it would have been if Emma had been there to enjoy it. Soon after giving birth to Jean-Louise, Emma Finch died. The sickness she had been battling the few months I had known her got to her when she gave birth to Scout, and that's when I started to call Mr. Finch Atticus.

Now Atticus was a funny fellow. The months before when I would waste away my whole day in his household accompanying his wife, I had seldom seen him before. Never in the morning would I see him except the one rare day when I saw him walking off to work at 10:00 am. He must have been late.

After 5:00 pm, I knew that he would come home, eat supper with his family, then, read till' late hours in his study. But when I did talk to him, when I did talk to that mysterious Atticus Finch, we had conversations that I would always remember. One of them was the day of the funeral when I stood bleakly in his house, pretending to enjoy myself, socializing with the other townsfolk of Maycomb about Emma's death, but really, inside I was miserable. He had came up to me and said:

"Miss. Katherine Atkinson, why don't you head on home to Miss. Maudie's house, you look plain as death and act as though you've seen ghost." His voice was soft and caring, his eyes gently resting on my stiff figure. I only responded with a simple:

"I could say the same to you, Mr. Finch."

"Yes, well child," he said placing down his drink. "I would love to, but unfortunately this _is _my home." I could tell that he enjoyed the after party as much as I did.

"Well, if you wanted Sir," I said almost knowing the result of my question. "You could come over to my house, and we could, well you know, just talk…" I paused, waiting for my answer, knowing that most defiantly it would be no. But instead his soft voice replied:

"That'd be very nice of you Miss. Katherine." There looked as though there were tears in his eyes, and I knew that the death of Emma hurt him the most out of all of us.

"Well come on then, Mr. Finch" I said taking his worn hand and leading him from the room.

"And Katherine" Mr. Finch said softly, looking down at me from his spectacles.

"Yes Mr. Finch?" I asked.

"Don't call me that. Call me Atticus." And so I did. And that was the start of our relationship.

Still, even after the death of Ms. Emma, I came over to Atticus's house day in and day out…not so much during the school days, but I still came. I think the only reason why I went there was because of Atticus. He needed me. Yes, he had Calpurnia, who looked after Jem and Scout in the absence of their dead mother, but he didn't have anyone to comfort him. And that's where I came in.

Now, it wasn't long before his whole family knew me, and I was considered a true blood born Finch. Every time a relative would visit they would say "Oh Atticus, where's that lovely girl who's always over here? That Katherine girl, _ah _yes, her!"

Yes, I came considerably close to the Finch family, especially with Atticus. He became like a mentor to me, and I his student. He didn't talk much, but when we did, it was often quite meaningful and important.

Now there was one other particular Finch that intrigued me the most. A Finch that somehow through the years changed me in more ways then one. His name was Jack. I had met him twice in my first year living in Maycomb, once at Christmas, and the second time at Ms. Emma's funeral. The second time we met we did not have as much fun.

Now Jack Finch was a professional man. He was 21, going through university and was very handsome. I think even at such a young age I felt infatuated with him, even though he would probably only ever look at me like a child. Now Jack and I had quite a peculiar relationship, even more so then the fatherly relationship I had with Atticus. I was quite fond of him, and I think him to me, and I often found myself counting down the days till his next visit.

But when he did come up, things between us just connected. It was sort of like a piece of a puzzle snapping together, yeah' know? We did very particular things, me and Jack Finch, very particular things indeed.

Why, he would tease the dickens' out of me, making fun of my hair and skinny arms. We would arm wrestle till my face turned blue, and somehow, Jack always managed to win. But I still remember the one time I did beat him, and he ended up paying me a nickel saying that we had made a bet way back when we first started even though I swear to this day he had said no such thing.

On other days, he would take me to the fishing creek and go swimming on Lakes Way and we would swim and swim for hours, just enjoying the time we spent outside. Yup, we must have made a pretty odd pair, Jack and me, both of us walking down the main street of Maycomb in trousers and a worn old flannel shirt (my trousers and shirt belonged to Jack, because I insisted that I would not wear a dress) and towels flung over our backs. Sometimes, we'd take Jem with us, but not Scout, cause' she was too young.

But I think the most fun I had with Jack whenever he was around was when he took me to town in his car to see the picture show. Oh his car, what a marvelous thing it was! It must have been the most expensive one in Maycomb with its fancy leather interior and lustrous chrome handles. It was always a pleasure riding in it for secretly I loved the scent of Jack which lofted though premises; like warm chardonnay or a bottle of whiskey, except sweeter. Where he had the money to afford such a car or such a marvelous scent was beyond me but I didn't complain.

But I remember when we went to the picture show I always insisted that I pay for the popcorn, but Jack would always argue, so he ended up paying both (it was those days when Aunt Maudie made for sure that I wore a dress).

But one day I decided to go out and make something of myself. I wasn't just about to become some homemaking house wife. I wanted to be something, and something important. So the moment I turned 18, I went off to Harvard to become a lawyer, just like Atticus. Of course back then, a women lawyer was unheard of, especially in the South, and so I took Atticus's advice and went back up North to Harvard.

After 4 long years of work I finally did it, I had become one the youngest female lawyers in the country (although later the standards would change to 7 years and I would have to reattend school.) And that's when I decided to come home.

By this time I was feeling needy, and a little mischievous. And so my thoughts turned to Jack. I thought about how much I had missed him in my 4 long years away and how much I wanted to hear the sweet sound of his voice. I also thought of my virginity. I was 21 and I was a virgin, and I wanted a boy. I wanted that first 'boy' to be Jack. So that's when I set out to get the man who had teased my little heart since childhood.

I could tell Jack was surprised when I returned to Maycomb, for I surly had developed since I had left. My flat and uneven chest and grown out, and now flaunted a very well set of baggage, along with my nicely grown into body. When I arrived, I wore the most revealing, yet mature looking outfit possible.

I wore a dress.

I could tell Jack no longer looked at me like a child when I walked into the Finch house to be welcomed. When he rounded that corner and saw me hugging Atticus, he just stood there, looking shocked. I smiled at Jack, letting go from my hug with Atticus and walked over to him. He hesitated at first, but drew me into a warm eloping hug. In those few moments I wanted him to know I had grown up, not just let him think it. I pushed up against him and I remember how exactly then I whispered how much I had missed him into his ear, making sure I was pressed even closer to him. By the time we were done, Jack looked flustered and an even a little more shocked then he already was. I smiled and walked away. I didn't realize it till quiet later that the look of shock on his face was because of my sudden forwardness towards him. He took my act of flirtation and didn't know what to make of it.

The next few days I spent all my time over at the Finch house, making sullen movements towards Jack, hoping that he would stay longer then the few short weeks of summer he was visiting. We did our normal itineraries that usually concurred when he visited, like going to the show and taking our walks together. But when we went out Jack made it strikingly obvious that we were not a couple, keeping distance between us, and laughing like old friends. But for some strange reason, it did not feel the same.

Once, during a picture show we went to see I dared to lean my head on his shoulder in a gesture of my affection towards him and to my surprise, he did not object. But it was strikingly obvious that by the look in his eyes that he was distracted and somewhat uncomfortable. It seemed that my vain attempts were going nowhere and that nothing I did would curve Jack's mind on our friendship. It seemed as though to Jack nothing had changed between us, that he felt nothing while I was desperately trying to catch his attention. Everything was different, but not in a good way, even the teasing had changed, which to Jack had become very inappropriate every since I had developed into a young lady. Of course it still happened every now and then, but Jack's voice had became gentler, almost tense as he said the words that I so strongly missed hearing. Why he even was hesitant to take me out to Blackville sometimes and looked at me like I was an alien every time I asked if we could take a ride in his car. He acted as though he didn't want to be near me. It hurt me very much.

But the one thing Jack would not do was take me to Lakes Way. It seemed no matter how I begged he would not take me swimming and refused to go, making up excuses and telling me "Some other time Katie" or "Why don't we go out to the swing behind the house?"

Finally, on the hottest day of the year I got so mad with him I blew up right in his face. Of course it had been very unlady like of me (a trait that had managed to stick with me through Harvard), but I didn't care. I yelled at him for a good 5 minutes before I slowly put his finger to my lips to silence me. When I finally held my tongue, he calmly tried to explain to me that he found it rather improper for us to be doing such activities, for it was fine and dandy when I was younger but now I was a young lady and had appearances to keep. He then continued on to tell me that he still thought some items we involved ourselves in made us look, well in his words quite "in adept" and he would not wish to in-service me any longer with such embarrassment.

Jack's little speech only made me angrier. Before he could finish I began to vent at him again on how before it had never matter how we 'looked' together and that I didn't give a rat's ass what everyone else thought. I told him that he treated me as though I was some, well 'lady' (which I wasn't), and didn't want him to act as though I was so delicate I might break. I told him that I hadn't changed as much as he thought I had and that I still wanted to go on like we had before, with the closeness that we had possessed. When I was done, Jack just looked at me. I could tell he was shocked and he was rather entitled, but the look on his face was still disapproving. I gave up with a sigh and told him:

"Jack, it's the hottest day of the year, and I just wanted to go swimmin', okay?" I thought that Jack was going to spew off at me again on how I had to start acting proper and all that other junk I didn't care about, but instead his expression softened and he smiled. And that's how me and Jack went swimming at Lake's Way for the first time in 5 years.

First, Jack and I had to get our swimming wear when I realized that I no longer possessed any pants to wear over my swim suit to begin with. I hadn't bought any in the last 4 years I was at Harvard thanks to strict dress-code and my old ones were much too small. To my avail, Aunt Maudy had also thrown out all my old work t-shirts as well. So as sheepishly as I could, I walked across the lawns to the Finch's to find Jack and tell him that I would be needing some cloths.

As I walked the stairs to presumably find him in his bedroom, I carelessly swung open his cracked door to find a quite unexpected surprise. I was mid sentence in asking if he was in his room when I came face to face with the half naked Jack changing into his swimming shorts. I saw quite a bit before he fell backwards in shock as he stumbled to the floor, tripping over his half pulled up trousers. I quickly spluttered my apologies and escaped the room quick as possible, trying to hide the evident blush on my face. When he later emerged he handed me a pair of worn blue jeans and a flannel shirt as if he knew why I had earlier intruded into his room.

There was a lot of silence between us until we reached the river. But this time, Jack drove us in his car. I think it was because of earlier and didn't want me to be seen with him because of my "appearance".

The whole way there was silent. I think it was because I was embarrassed, and Jack was still rather disapproving at our outing. But once we arrived at the river, I told myself I wouldn't let Jack's attitude get in the way of having a good-time!

As it turned out, nobody was at LakesWay that day. It seemed everyone in Maycomb had found a better swimming spot up the road near Blackville.

It was early afternoon, the sun shining, and the river was flowing as gracefully as ever. The same old oak tree was hanging dangerously low over the river bank and there was still the same old tire swing. I could tell Jack was still uncomfortable with the situation, being that only married couples of our age went swimming together alone, but I ignored him and ran at the river. My clothing shed and soon I was in nothing but my rather 'unfashionable-and-much-too-revealing-for-the-times' swimsuit heading full speed towards the waters edge.

I raced towards the bank and dared to jump when I felt a presence behind me. It was Jack. He had not yet removed his clothing and it didn't look like he was going to anytime soon.

"You go and have fun" was all he said. "I think I'll just sit on the bank and watch for a while." My spirit deflated when I realized his intentions, and frowned. I didn't let him see it though, for I was too light hearted to let him ruin my fun. I ran at the bank and jumped in.

The water was cool and refreshing and felt like it always had. I let the current sweep me away as I stroked careful arms through the rivers gentle flow. I lay docile for awhile and forgot Jack was even there, just letting the river relax me into a state of contempt. How I had missed swimming here so much. My peace was shattered when I heard a snort from the shore's banks. It was Jack. As it seemed he was still in his clothing, but was looking more lighthearted and was sitting there watching me.

"What?" I asked as his playful eyes watched me. When he didn't answer and just smiled, I said "Are you going to come in or what?" It seemed Jack had finally loosened up a little.

"It seems-," he said eying the tire swing hanging dangerously avert to my left. "That you have failed to complete tradition." I eyed him carefully, trying to understand the meaning of his phrase. When I didn't answer his smile broadened. "Have you forgot our little ritual already Katie?" he asked me with jovial amusement.

"Well 5 years is quite a long time," I answered still trying to remember, buying myself time. When I didn't say anything else Jack finally caved.

"The tire swing," was all he said. "Don't you remember, Katherine?" And that's when I _did _remember. I hadn't jumped off the tire swing yet. All the memories it brought back to me of Jack and I and the many summers ago in which we would jump off its black rubber curves into the depths of the river, starting each swim in the same fashion.

"It's too late," I conjured downfallen, looking at the black tire. "I've already jumped." Jack smiled.

"It doesn't matter," he said still with a grin on his face. "You can fix that by jumping right now."

"Well when are you going to come into the river?" I counter.

"I'll come in as soon as you jump," he replied. I eyed him carefully to see if this wasn't some sort of prank, but when I saw no jest in his eyes I swam diligently towards the shore.

"Fine," I said. "But I swear Jack Finch, if you don't jump into those waters the moment I feel its touch, you'll be a dead man!" Jack just smiled and nodded.

I walked towards the tire swing after climbing from the steep bank and felt Jacks gaze on me. I knew he was watching. As I grabbed the swaying swing, I stepped into the crevice in between the folds of rubber, securing my foot. I grabbed hold of the rope and turned to Jack who was still sitting lazily on the ground.

"Jump!" he called with anticipation.

And I did.

I swung full out into the river, watching the water pass beneath the tire. I watched the current swirl and bubble, and with the final tilt towards skydom, I let go. I watched the water beneath me come closer and closer, its current suddenly looking more agile and quick. Eddies foamed and the water looked black. That's when I realized something was wrong. I had swung too far out, just like I had the first time I swung off the tire swing. But it was too late now. My body hit the cold, rushing water and for a moment I thought I was going to be okay. Then, I went under. I realized I was drowning.

As it turned out, Jack kept his word. He had watched me from the moment I jumped off the tire swing. He told me he had been laughing at first, smiling to see me complete our ritual and then he waited for me to come up. Seconds passed and no soaking wet head of blonde hair rose to the surface. Then Jack was frowning. By the time I hit the bottom of the river, pulled under by its strong current, Jack had dove in the water, swimming viciously towards the spot where I had gone under.

As it turned out Jack was still much stronger then me and was able to fight the overwhelming currents and undertows. I however, was not. As he dove under the waters in search of me, he felt an arm, then a body and immediately grabbed me and swam to the surface. As we reached the surface, I had already run out of air.

I remember how he tightened his grip around me, his arm securely tucked under my breasts. I was choking and coughing up water and I didn't realize that my thrashing was causing Jack such trouble in swimming to shore. He quickly and diligently shed his clothing, struggling to escape the very pants that were weighing him down and slipped out from his shirt. He had swum much faster then, and as we reach the rivers banks he shoved me up over its dirt walls, my body rolling in a very limp fashion, before I began to cough violently again. He then climbed up himself. I lay coughing on my knees, spitting up water, trying to clear my airways as Jack sat and revived himself of his fatigue. Before that moment, I had never known Jack had had such a temper.

As we lay tangled on the ground together, both soaking wet he turned to me and started to yell. "What were you thinking?" he said with much anger. "Jumping into the deep waters like that…you could've drowned!" I sat there shivering, the warm summer day no longer seeming so hot.

"Jack-, I'm sorry," was all I could say, trying to give a decent explanation.

"Sorry? _Sorry?_" he yelled releasing another vent of rage. "You could've died out there, you nearly did! How do you think I would feel if I had to drag your dead body back home? How do you think your Aunt or Atticus or even Jem would feel knowing that you died takin' a swim!'" His eyes were full of anger, and he stared at me with such intensity that made me want to hide like a little girl. When I didn't answer and just looked away, ashamed of my stupidity, it seemed I only angered him even more. He grabbed my shoulders, and dug his thumbs into my back, pulling me closer to listen.

"Look!" he yelled at me. "You almost died, you were almost dragged away by the current, never to be seen again! Do you know how much you worried me when you didn't come up? Do you?" He shook me violently, and now I could feel something else inside. I couldn't hold it in any longer and I didn't care if Jack saw. Hot tears fell from my eyes, interrupting Jack's verbal attack and I started to cry. When Jack saw my tears, it was like he had come out of a trance. He stopped yelling at me and let go of my shoulders. He kept telling me to stop crying, that he didn't like to see me in tears, but I couldn't. "Katie-," he was about to say, but I had had enough. I had had enough of Jack Finch for one day and that was saying a lot.

"No Jack!" I sobbed when he tried to speak. "I mean what else do you want me to say? I said I was sorry! Isn't that enough? Look, I'm sorry I jumped into the deep water, it was an accident! I didn't mean too, okay? I didn't mean it! I'm sorry okay-I-,I-,I-…" I trailed off and started to cry again, shaking violently and not from the sudden coldness of the air. As I let all my recent frustration out, crying for Jack to see, I suddenly felt a warm body next to mine. It was Jack. He pulled me closer to him, and positioned me against his chest, his arm wrapped around me like a blanket.

"I'm sorry Katie," he said in quite voice, looking down at my puffy eyes. "You're not the one who should be apologizing, its just you don't know how much I was worried when you didn't come up again. I thought you were dead…I thought I wasn't going to be able to see you again. If that had happened…I don't know what I would have done with myself." My crying had become nothing but silent sniffles as I listened to his words. We sat there for quite a long time afterwards. When we go up to go Jack led me to the car and said one last thing. "We won't be going swimming anymore." I didn't object.

When returned home later that afternoon we said nothing of my near death experience. Instead, we ate diner without talking, almost acting as though it had never happened.

The next couple days between us were very stiff. Jack refused almost ever outing I offered, making up even more excuses or saying that he was ill. He avoided me around town and made sure he was out every time I came over to the Finch's. I knew Jack was avoiding me and it made me hate him for being so childish. Or maybe it was I who was doing such things…longing for his company so often. I really didn't know. But the summer was almost over and one thing I did know was that that no matter what I did, Jack would still not accept me.

And one day, I had enough. I was sick of Jack Finch and I was sick of longing after him like a love-struck puppy. And when he found out, things didn't exactly go as planned.

The whole affair happened one fine Tuesday evening at supper. We gathered around the table to feast of one of Calpurnia's finely prepared meals in recognition for Jack's departure which would occur in the following days. It was a quiet meal, and I acted in the uttermost _charming _of manners. Oh of course I was polite and considerate, acting of my best behavior, but it was the sharp smiles, unmistakable cutoff glances and sudden disengagement in Jack's conversations that got me caught, for he certainly noticed.

I was half way through ignoring the protruding stare of Jack, which I felt glaring down at me while I talked to Calpurnia about who knows what, when Jack sharply cut me off in asking for the third time for me to pass the salt.

"Could you not wait!" I simply replied raising my voice. By this time, all noise at the table had stopped, all ears and eyes attentive to Jack and I. "If you haven't noticed, I am in deep conversation with Calpurnia, and you have persisted to _continuously _interrupt me with no avail! Besides, it is not that hard to reach across the table and get the salt yourself?" I paused for a moment before continuing, thinking. I went for it. "I mean that's if you weren't_ so_ involved with yourself and worried so much about keeping up appearances!" I paused again. "Oh wait, I forgot, you're Jack Finch and its only appearances that matter, right? And by reaching across the table in such an _ungentlemanly_ like manner, you would be showing everyone that you're not a stiff and overly arrogant idiot."

By this time the table was dead silence. Jem dropped a knife. Scout gasped. Jack stared at me with angry eyes. I knew I had crossed a line. Before I could say anything else, Jack grabbed my wrist from across the table and dragged me from the room. We stood in the front hall and he was furious.

"How _dare_ you act in such a fashion!" he yelled at me. "This is no way to deal with any such matter, _especially_ in this household!"

"Oh don't you lecture me Jack Finch!" I countered back appalled by this sudden confrontation. "I am not a child a child anymore!"

"Oh well you certainly have been acting like one!" he chortled back in mock laughter. "That little display in the dinning room was one in a million _Katherine_. I bet not even Scout could've pulled that one off when she was _eight_!"

"You shut your mouth Jack Finch!" I fumed, poking his chest. "It isn't wise calling the kettle black when you yourself are just as guilty!"

"Oh this_ is_ rich!" he replied sarcastically, crossing his arms. "Look" he said sharply at me. "I've had enough, I refuse to put up with this behavior from you! I don't know what you're trying to play at Katie, but from the moment you walked in the door, you have been walking on thin ice, and its dangers like those that shouldn't be tampered with! Now you stop your foolish games before both of us fall through!"

I had been caught. Caught and hanged by the person who wasn't suppose to catch me. I dared to continue.

"And tell me Jack Finch-," I said mustering all the anger he had arisen within me from the last few weeks. "What if I want to fall through?" I crossed my arms and waited for a response. He matted his hand through his brown messy hair and gave a stressful sigh.

Somehow along the line, our outraged conversation had taken an off handed turn and we both knew it wasn't about the salt.

"Don't you get it?" he responded. "This is not some game anymore. We aren't going to the show or taking walks or even swimming! It's not some little hobby for you to toy around with or even use to fill the time. It's dangerous!"

"Oh don't tell me that you never felt anything Jack, don't lie to me!" I was in hysterics now. Suddenly everything was coming apart. And he just looked at me with disappointed eyes.

"I'm not lying Katherine, for the first time in my life I'm being serious with you. Now stop this game before it goes too far."

"Don't tell me that Jack, don't lie. Don't tell me you never felt not one feeling and that you have only ever just looked upon me as a friend." I was literally begging him now. His mouth twitched, and then he answered.

"I'm not." That was it. It was over. Inside my heart shattered into a thousand little pieces, each shard ripping at my chest. But on the outside I held back my tears and kept a stiff upper lip, clamming up like a shell on Easter. It wouldn't let him see my cry, at least not this time.

"Fine" I replied curtly. He looked surprised by my answer. "Then I guess I shall be seeing you, Mr. Finch." I turned so sharply and so suddenly I'm sure that I caught him off guard. I grabbed my petty-coat, reached for my rag of a scarf and threw open the door. I walked quickly and as briskly as I could down the front steps without even bothering to shut it behind me. I could feel the light from the house pouring down on me, and I could also feel Jack's presence watching me from the door.

"Where are you going?" he asked protrusively. His voice was insensitive, and untrusting. It felt like I didn't know him anymore.

"Away," I replied without even bothering to look back. Instead I just kept walking.

"What?" he chortled after me in mock laughter. "Home? Your house is just next door Katie!"

For the first time in my life Jack treated me like he did with every other women he was with; he treated me like I was unintelligent, too little to look after herself, and above all, with tittering and mock sarcasm, the type in which is meant to lead on.

"No" I replied venomously to his response. I could see he was leaning uncaringly against the doorstep now, his arms crossed and his eyes dark. I really had nowhere to go and really wasn't planning to, but instead thought of the most prominate and spiteful place to go to hurt him. "I'm going back to New York." I paused and held a spiteful and perhaps grim smile. With those few words Jack became enraged. He left his post at the door.

"New York?" he replied ludicrously. "You're going to New York? You haven't been there since you were 12! I mean when did you decide this?!"

"Just now" I said ignoring his presence walking behind me.

"You are so stupid sometimes, Kat!" he said throwing his hands up in the air. "I can't believe you, one little fight and you've decided to run away! I mean how do you expect to live. You have no money, no job and no place to go…I mean sometimes I wonder if you even think!"

"And what is that suppose to mean?!" I asked sharply, whipping myself around to face him.

"What?" he replied defensively.

"That I never think-, that I'm stupid!" I answered sarcastically.

"It's only the truth, Katie," he said hurtingly. "Sometimes you never do think. I mean you just go around with your head in the clouds ignoring the fact that yes, one day you will have to grow up and stop acting like such a child and its better you learn that now then later so that I'll have to stop defending you from the people in this town! I mean, haven't you ever stopped to think what your running around and wild antics might look like to everyone around you, especially when you go ahead and involve me with them?! People talk Katie, and sometimes I can't do anything to stop it! You're a lady Katherine, not some run-around-tramp, although sometimes you'd never know it!"

But this wasn't something I was expecting. I wasn't expecting Jack to say such hurtful words. At the moment I hated his words. I hated ever looking up to him, ever playing chess with him, ever just meeting him. I wanted him to disappear and the same with painful hole that he had just created in my chest. I wanted to cry and bury myself under a pile of blankets and never be seen again. I wanted to run and never see _him_ again. I loathed him.

"Well I'm glad-" I said in a shaky voice, afraid that my shameful tears might fall right there and then. "-Well I'm glad that this is all coming out now Jack Finch-," I said clenching my fist. "-Because it has now saved me the trouble of learning the hard way that you really are nothing but an arrogant and hurtful bastard. I never want to see you awful face again. And to think that I thought I might be falling in love with you-" I stopped and gasped. But it seemed at those last few words my tongue had slipped. I surge of hate broke through me as now I knew my humiliation was complete. He wasn't supposed to know. But the look on his face topped it all off. I didn't even know how to describe it. Disgust perhaps? It was the straw the broke the camels back.

"God!" I cried painfully, finally letting the tears fall. I didn't let him speak. I didn't let him do anything. Instead I rushed inside the empty house and locked the door. I had never planned to go to New York, but that's how things ended up. I couldn't stand to stay here anymore. I slid down the backside of the door, crying and listening to the persistent banging coming from outside.

"Let me in Katie!" he yelled. His voice only caused me more pain. The banging was getting louder and so was the yelling. Soon the whole neighborhood would know that me and Jack had had a fight and like Jack had said, they would talk.

Oh I had been so naïve?! How could I not see what I was doing? I had destroyed our friendship and most of all our connection all because I refused to wear a goddamn dress and act pretty! The banging got louder and louder and soon I felt myself sobbing uncontrollable, my hands balled up in my face.

"Go away Jack!" I screamed. But he didn't.

The next few minutes were paced in a blur. I managed to make my way to my room and Jack managed to break open the door. He followed me in a loathing manner, questioning my every move, hurting me even more with his hateful insults and sarcastic comments. Soon my bag was packed, I was ready to go and Jack was still there, still pushing me farther into the hole I created.

What had happened to the sensitive and care-loving Jack I had known from my childhood? Where had the Jack who arm wrestled me and shoved me into the water during our swims gone? What had happened to the Jack I grew up idolizing and eventually growing to love disappeared too? No, instead he was quiet and reserved, continually persisting in ignoring and avoiding me, and now he was hurting and bitter, his uncharacteristic actions only making the situation worse. How had he managed to change so much while I had changed so little? It was all very confusing.

I was now downstairs, my bag packed, and my eyes still very red from crying. I couldn't leave though, for Jack stood unmoving in front of the door.

"Please stand aside, Jack," I said listlessly. His eyes only darkened and he crossed his arms.

"Please Katherine, stop this now before it goes to far. Stop and think about what your doing, I mean you don't even have a way to get to Blackville to take the bus."

"Jack," I said, my eyes looking directly at him. "It already has gone too far. I've made a fool of myself for the last time. And if what you say is true, then I have done so for far too long in this town. I would no longer wish to inconvenience anyone, including yourself with my ungodly and tramp-like presence."

"You still don't have a way to get to Blackville," he said not breaking eye contact.

"I'll find a way," I said fixing my scarf. "Catch a ride with a passing car perhaps." At this point, I had managed to push my way past Jack and began my studious walk down the path to the street. Jack rushed after me.

"Catch a ride with a passing car?" he asked ludicrously. "You really must be _dense_, Katherine! Do you realize how dangerous that could be!"

"Well what do you propose I do, Jack?!" I said angrily, spinning around. "I have no other way besides walking and I really do insist on leaving this wretched town _this _instant. I can no longer stand you or the people here and would hate to be the next big gossip that makes its tiny little wheels go round!" He gave a tedious sigh and motioned towards the Finch's house.

"Get in my car," he said quietly. "If you really must insist on doing something so stupid, then the least thing I can do is bring you there without letting you put yourself in mortal danger."

I quietly obliged and walked silently towards his car. He took my bag, placed it in the trunk and got in, waiting for me to do the same. I slammed the door, he started the engine and he drove off, leaving a rather large trail of dust behind us.

The Finch family managed to catch the tail end of us as I got in the car, Jack starting the engine and us driving off.

"Where's a' Uncle Jack and Miss. Katherine going?" I would later learn Jem had asked. Atticus would sigh and herd his son back into the house and say:

"It's best to leave the world of young lovers alone Jem. Now come in before your supper gets cold."

The ride to Blackville was uncomfortable and overly cold. No one spoke and no longer did I enjoy the pleasant smell of Jack that wafted through out the interior of his car. He kept his eyes directly on the road, his jaw stiff and rigid, his posture unmoving.

"You do realize that your Aunt will be wondering what has happened?" he asked me in a tone that told me he was thoroughly displeased.

"You can explain to her what I've done," I said looking at his face. It was evident he was restraining himself for his knuckles were white while his fingers grasped the steering wheel.

"And what do you want me to tell her?" he asked in the same rigid voice, the distance resonating from it beyond obvious.

"Anything you'd like Jack," I replied. "I mean after all I am nothing but a run-around-tramp, right? Tell her I've gone off to sell myself on the streets."

I was purposely trying to get him angry and I knew it was working. His mouth twitched, his jaw becoming strained and I saw that look in his eyes. It was the same look he had held earlier when he relentlessly followed me around the house.

"Besides," I said looking out the window. "It's not like anyone will care. I've always been the black sheep of the family, even more so then Scout."

At those words Jack veered the car to the side of the road and abruptly stopped, causing me to jerk forwards and loose my balance.

"What was that about?" I said turning to look at him. "Why in the dickens' did you-," But the look on his face caused me to go silent. He wasn't looking at me, but rather much straight in front of him with his hands still griping the wheel.

"What makes you think nobody cares?" he asked me, his face full of frustration. "I mean sometimes I wonder why I put up with you because all you seem to think about is yourself! I mean haven't you stopped one moment in your life to look around and see what everyone is doing for you? It's because I care I'm telling you this, Katherine, you make me wonder if you are really blind sometimes."

"Stop it, Jack" I said angrily, grinding my teeth.

"No" he countered back, removing his hands from the steering wheel and turning to face me. "You have to understand that sometimes people do things in order to protect you. You're not a little girl anymore and that's what you have to understand."

"But what I don't understand is you, Jack!" I said. "I don't understand why at sometimes you'll be smiling so caringly, taking me on walks, then the next you're acting as if you don't even know me! I mean what am I suppose to think? Do I repulse you? Is that why you keep up making excuses and lies to stay away from me? Was I only a game to you as a child and now that I've grown up you are no longer interested in playing? Tell me Jack, for it's all very confusing for me!"

Once again, Jack ruffled his hair, closing his eyes and sighed.

"Answer me Jack!-," I cried. He cut me off by grabbing me and pressing his lips against my own. It wasn't at all gentle like I had expected it to be, but rather much powerful, and full of pent up frustration and tension. It lingered and then was gone, and I was left with nothing more but his self-loathing face. I gasped.

"Is that what you wanted?" he asked me, his voice full of animosity. "Is it? For me to kiss you and take you for my own?"

I knew his kiss was meant to cause me even more hate and disgust and his words only made it worse.

"Jack," I said quietly, touch his arm. He pushed me away and looked out the window.

"Why can't you ever make things simple Jack Finch!" I yelled at him. "Why do you always have to complicate things?"

"Because," he said turning to look at me. "It_ is_ complicated! Don't you get it? I can't do this with you, I can't kiss you without feeling some sort of guilt and almost perversion! You're almost 10 years my junior, yet I can't help but feel something for you. I hate it when I see you hurt, but its me that's causing you the most of it! I've known you since you were 12 and to everyone around us, it would be wrong. That's why I've been pushing you away, Katherine. People get the wrong idea and I don't want this to happen. People have been saying things for months, that you're fallen and that I have been involved with you in illicit activities…you don't know how angry it made me to find out that Stephanie Crawford was the one who started it all. Atticus nearly had to restrain me. It's been so awkward for me to be around you without wanting to so something that I'd regret, but I can't help it."

"Don't you get it?" I said in disbelieve. "I don't care what everyone thinks about me! I mean why else would I go swimming and walk down Main Street wearing trousers? If you haven't figured it out Jack, I'm not like your lady friends from back home who all they care about is there posture and dress size!"

Once again, he sighed.

"You don't give up do you?" he asked tiredly. "And that's what concerns me…I always figured I'd fall for something like that, someone like my sister, but instead when I found myself falling for you, I didn't know what to make of it. I think Atticus might have figured it out before I did, but he never said anything."

"Jack-," But he cut me off with his finger.

"Are you sure you want this?" he asked still looking pained.

"For Mary's sake, yes Jack!" I said exasperated.

I don't exactly remember what happened next, but I do remember that at this point in time, I soon found myself feverently endowing the kisses of Jack Finch and his warm arms. It was more wonderful then I had ever dreamed.

The next morning he drove us back to Maycomb and presented me to Atticus and the rest of the family as his soon to be wife.

The evening before, I can proudly say we spent in Blackville where Jack and I stayed in a quaint hotel where as I gave him my virginity as well as the promise to marry him.

Well Aunt Maudie, as you can imagine was pleased beyond punch, telling me how she knew all along Jack and I would get together. Atticus merely nodded in approval, while Scout and Jem were ecstatic to find out I would be becoming their new Aunt. They said their other one, Alexandra was much too stuffy and old to be any fun.

Of course like Jack had said, the town's people talked, calling it improper and wrong, but you should have seen how Jack reacted! Why he got so angry about how they were talking about me and how Jack deserved someone more his age that he went straight into their afternoon social and yelled at them so hard that not another peep was heard from Stephanie Crawford's gossip group. They even insisted on me joining them for Sunday afternoon tea as repentance towards they way they acted towards me. For god only knows what Jack said to them, but since then we have had no trouble from them with our relationship.

But this is just the beginning of our story, the rest of it is still to come.

* * *

AN: Wow. That was a really long first chapter. Oh well, I have fun writing this, mostly because I simply adore Harper Lee's writing style. In other news I probably won't update this for a while since I do have to update my TT fiction (I am hating myself for not posting anything in so long) so be prepared. Read and Review and I'm over and out. -ox

**Note**: This is not a one shot thing. There will be more then one chapter.


End file.
